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I mean, really now. Do they think they're helping somehow? Making up for all of us speeders? Do they really feel 55 is just wa-a-a-a-a-ay to fast? And, if so, WTF are they doing in the bloody passing lane????
I'm just sayin'.Current Mood:  annoyed |
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Been so long and I have much to catch up on. I'm not going to take this space to do that, but instead highlight our trip thus far so I don't forget details. Hopefully, I'll have more time later to fill in the gaps.( Read more... )
Oh, and what I forgot to mention is the BATS. They are flippin' HUGE. Like, bodies the size of a cat HUGE. We saw one the other night with the wing span that of a small car. Hundreds of them in one tree screeching to high heaven. Very, very creepy.Current Mood:  quixotic |
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Sorry. Been stupid busy with moving lately. No excuse as I can dick around a work all day. I beg forgiveness with a plethora of zombie goodness:
...Because the apocalypse doesn't have to be lonely
What do vegan zombies eat?
GRAAAAAAAAIIIIIIINNNNS
(or, as my boy guessed, BRRRRRAAAAAAAANNNN)
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| » For Erick |
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Jun. 2nd, 2008 @ 03:37 pm
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| » What it's like living with an ADHD/Asperger's child |
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I'm changing jobs this week because I simply can't work the hours my current job demands and be an effective parent to my son. I've always placed his needs above my own with the hopes that, as he got older, the balance of time would fall more in my favor. Instead, in many ways, I find that as he ages he seems to actually require *more* of my time. The difference is, it's harder for me to give it willingly and cheerfully as I could when he was a toddler.
I've been chastised by other parents for admitting this: The dark, awful truth that I sometimes resent and don't like my son. He interferes with me and *my* life. I love him. He's wonderful. He's mine and I wouldn't trade him for the world. But I'm so bloody tired some days.
I berate myself for being a bad mom. I mean, after all, it's only ADD. It's only Asperger's. It's not like it's retardation or deafness or cerebal palsy. But it is exhausting to me, just the same.
I remember twelve. I have two step-sons who are at that same age who are constant reminders of s the age. Twelve is that magical/terrible in between stage. Young enough for cartoons and legos. Old enough for fashion trends and whispers of the opposite sex. At twelve, you start separating from your family's ideals to discover your own, while still fiercely clinging with one hand to all that you know...just in case. It's the beginning of that manic age of simultaneous hate and love for all that home represents. It's the dawn of adulthood.
Not if you have ADD/Asperger's. These children don't understand the world around them and have no desire to learn. They posses an arrogance about how things should be that borders on narcissim. They will fiercely refuse anything that doesn't fit in their world perimeter even if it harms them to do so. The smallest slight is perceived as a full on attack. Every confrontation is an invitation to verbal war. You can't expect change from these children. They simply aren't capable of it. Routine is their armor. Detail is their sword.
When raising an ADD/Asperger's child, it's not enough to say, "put on your shoes". You must tell them to put on their sock, as well. They may have been told to do it this way for eleven years, but until some internal mechanism in their brain finally flips over, this step does not exist. It is not uncommon to find yourself saying, "What did you think I meant when I said...." to someone in this condition. Fact is, they *didn't* think. The processing part of their brain did not allow for any deviation to original request of action. Therefore, "rinse your dinner dishes" will get the plate washed, but not the glass or silverware. "Bring in the trash cans" will find the lids lying in the street. "Feed the dog" will get it food, but not water. Until such time that the task becomes one entire action in their minds, the child simply will not see the other steps involved.
The most difficult part is discerning the disability from the child. At what point does parenting and not counseling become involved? Meaning: When am I, as a parent, just making excuses for poor behavior? Is he doing this because he's lazy? Because he's pushing me? Or can he simply, physically not process what I'm telling him?
At twelve, I should have the expectations that he wants to go play with his friends rather than talk at me for hours about a video game he's created in his head. I should be able to tell him to perform a task and trust that it will get done without constant supervision. At twelve, I should expect regular hygiene happens without needing an adult in the bathroom to check that teeth have been brushed and deodorant has been used and towels have been hung up and clothes have been put on <b>every day</b>. At twelve, I should expect there will be lapses in judgment from time to time as he explores his expanding world; but not to have the continual daily following around to ensure every activity is completed.
I'm tired. That's all. I'm just tired. I want my very brilliant, talented child to be successful in whatever he wants. I want to encourage and lift him up. Instead, I'm stuck in the rut nagging until the mundane becomes routine. I don't know if I'm helping anything, really, or just maintaining. This is what it's like when you live with ADHD/Aspergers.
Apr. 29th, 2008 @ 08:15 am
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| » So way busy not even funny |
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It's like I'm up all the time and never get enough sleep. Can't remember the last time I gamed. Worst thing is, I have so much to do, I can no longer successfully pick out the number ones from the number fives. They're all OMG I HAVE TO DO THIS NO THIS AND I HAVEN'T DONE THIS ARRRRRGGGGHHHH!!!! Yes. I have ADD anxiety.
Current to do list:
1. Plan honeymoon.
2. Plan wedding.
3. Plan reception.
4. Get passport.
5. Arrange babysitter for three weeks for ADD boy.
6. Arrange summer camps for ADD boy.
7. Arrange kennel for animals for all vacations this year.
8. Get shots for animals for kennels.
9. Interview realtors.
10. List house.
11. CLEAN house (zomg).
12. Purge furniture.
13. Fix house and yard.
14. Purge furniture from his house.
15. Fix his house and yard.
16. Change jobs
17. Tell this job I'm changing jobs.
18. Clean my mutherfucking house so I can stand living in it just for TODAY.
19. All the other day-to-day stuff that requires living like laundry and groceries and shit.
20. Go to doctors and dentists and all the stuff I've been neglecting for ME because I'm busy with the rest of the world.
This is on top of the brazillion kid things I'm committed to just to get my son on a some what normal playing field with the rest of the world. I'm slightly overwhelmed atm. All of these things feel like they should have been handled months ago. And, on top of that, I have the guilt that I never see my mom anymore because I simply do not have the time to drive out to BF New Baltimore to sit and visit for six hours (which is pretty much the time frame she demands).
Anywho, I'm plugging away at it and need to take comfort in the small whittling being done on the sculpture of my life.
So, anywho, ERICK!!! Linky for you! http://detroit.craigslist.org/web/643757988.html. You still looking?
Apr. 16th, 2008 @ 09:55 am
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| » Mainly for Erick, but anyone else with fabulous TV taste |
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 Just picked up the
Adventures Of Brisco County Jr on DVD for $25. Troy and I have been watching the HELL out of it. Is there seriously anyone better than Bruce Campbell? I mean, really, sci-fi/comedy/western all in one....no wonder it had to die. At least it lasted a little longer than Firefly.
Feb. 26th, 2008 @ 11:18 am
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| » An oldy, but a goody |
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Yeah, I *know* it's as old as the internet, but it's damn funny and maybe someone hasn't seen it. And, even if you have, it's damn funny.
Feb. 2nd, 2008 @ 10:25 pm
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